Jovie Lauren: a birth story and 1-3 month update

On October 6th, I had been having a weird day. Jovie has been unusually quiet in my womb. She typically was very active. Lots of rolls, tumbles, and swift jabs in my ribs. That day though, she was quiet. Only soft jabs here and there. I was 39 weeks exactly. This time three years ago I was induced with Finn because of high blood pressure. My blood pressure had been creeping up but remaining steady at 138/88 and my midwives had told me to keep an eye on it at home and if it ever went above 140/90 to go into L&D immediately. Thankfully my numbers at home remained normal, 120s/70s and we had chalked most of it up to white coat syndrome. I had the best midwives who really allowed me to “safely” trust my body.  My pregnancy was perfect. No heartburn, no real aches or pains. I honestly barely felt pregnant until around 37/38 weeks. I remained pretty active and continued to chase my busy toddler around daily. But on October 6th I knew things were weird. I put Finn to bed and was still feeling nervous about how inactive Jovie was. Zach woke up and I sent him off to work, telling him I was going to take a bath and go to bed. At 10 pm I took my blood pressure and it was in the 150s/80s. I thought maybe it was because of the hot bath and not feeling well so I emailed Zach and let him know what was going on and that I would keep him posted. About 15 minutes later I took it again and it was even higher. He called me from work and I became hysterical. I became worried that I had maybe been stressing Jovie out all day because of my high bp and that’s why she hadn’t been moving much. I told Zach I was going in and he told me he’d meet me at the hospital. 

ENTER HOSPITAL 

I arrive at L&D somewhere around 11pm. Zach arrived, from work, before I did. I told them what was going on and they triaged me, setting me up for a NST (non stress test) to check on Jovie and a bp machine. My bp was in the 150s/80s and still creeping up. At one point it spiked to 170/90 and I pretty much knew I wasn’t going home. What were the odds that I’d be induced the same day as I was with Finn? 39 weeks exactly when we were induced and had them both 39 weeks and 1 day. 

ENTER LABOR AND DELIVERY

They hook me up to a monitor. It’s about 1:30 am at this point. I’m bound to the bed unless I have to pee. I choose to go the oral route and I take a misoprostol to get the ball rolling. Thankfully I was 1 cm dilated and approximately 50% effaced, so my body knew what was coming. Zach had gone home to wait for our angel babysitter and pack a bag for the hospital. Thankfully this time around I had already started packing a bag but of course I didn’t bring anything to the hospital with me except for a 10% charged phone and my wallet. He arrived around 2 am. I attempted to snooze but my contractions were uncomfortable and irregular. I asked for nitrous to be hooked up this time around since my epidural with Finn failed and I wasn’t planning on get another one. I’ll get around to talking about how amazing nitrous is, but if you’re having a baby and your hospital offers it, 10/10 HIGHLY recommend. 

Time gets blurry here. 

I got a second dose of miso in the morning since I wasn’t really progressing. The second dose brought on horrendous contractions and at this point I’m just trying to be zen. I couldn’t lay back because I was 1. paranoid Jovie would flip sunny side up and 2. back labor was real. I remember them bringing me lunch at some point and it was so awful smelling I yelled at Zach to move it before I threw up. I think he ate it.

At this point I’m wanting my water broken. Break my damn water. No one will break my water. 

I get the damn foley bulb instead. I am not dilating, my contractions are too irregular to break my water, and the Foley bulb is my only option. 

But of course the foley bulb fails because I’m not a first time mother. My body can’t be tricked. Jovie will only be coming on her accord. 

I’m not totally sure when I asked for epidural but I believe it was around 4pm. My contractions were so fierce but so irregular and I was exhausted and couldn’t find a rhythm. I was hoping the epidural would provide some relief and rest as well as possibly relax my body and help me progress. I don’t think I was even dilated to a 4 yet. They pulled the foley bulb out around 3.5, so I was somewhere around there. 

So I sit there. I sit patiently, fighting through contractions, getting poked in my epidural space. I feel the cool rush of liquid run through my spine. I pick my feet up and lay back, waiting for relief. 

You know what doesn’t come? 

Hi, my name is Kellie. My anatomy is incompatible for epidurals. They do not work in my body. If we haven’t met, welcome to my second birth story where I have to have an un-medicated birth despite asking for an epidural. 

So basically I just cry. They keep rolling me back and forth, telling me “it’ll work, give it time”. 

A lot happens between that and me pushing Jovie out. To sum it up, my anesthesiologist was pulling his hair out trying to provide me relief. I was battling a major mind game because I had gotten to the point where I wanted relief but couldn’t have it. I’m crying, you’re crying, we’re all crying. 

And I’m only dilated at a 6. My stubby fingered sweet trainee nurse told me so. 

THE DELIVERY AND BIRTH: 

So here I am. Laying on my side because 1. back labor 2. SHE WILL NOT BE COMING OUT SUNNY SIDE UP, NO THANK YOU. 

I’m at a 6. The anesthesiologist told me he can redo the epidural but he didn’t think I would be able to sit still long enough and it probably wouldn’t work (he said it nicer than that but I don’t beat around bushes). He’s like, “I’ll come back in a bit and we’ll discuss it”. 

So he walks out and I’m like, “OHHHHHH SHES COMING” really loud and in the “mommy moan”. I can still hear myself saying it. This was the transition. I was nearing the end. I then say something along the lines of “I need something, anything, I can’t do this” and I’ll be damned if my nurse didn’t get up in my face and tell me “you can do this, you will do this, and you will suck on this nitrous oxides until you have a baby in your arms”. 

Like, ok lady. 

So I take the face mask and if an angelic choir could be heard right now, imagine that and just pure bliss. It didn’t take the pain away but it made it tolerable. I could focus on what I needed to do instead of panicking. They told me I had a “bulging bag” and I told them I was going to push (which, just like with Finn, they told me no and to wait for my midwife). 

Time passes but I’m so high on nitrous I just focus on keeping Jovie in. I’m sure it was 5-10 minutes but it felt like an eternity. 

My midwife entered, gowned up, told me my bag was bulging and to “listen to your body and push when you’re ready”. A contraction came and I pushed Jovie half out in her water sac. I could feel it and I asked if Zach could get a picture. After he took a picture I contracted again and could hear my midwife telling me to wait as she put her goggles on but I pushed Jovie out anyway. Her water sac popped as soon as my midwife caught her. It was amazing pushing out a giant water ballon. 

I took off my mask at 5:45 pm as they placed my little 8 pound mermaid on my chest. It was just as magical as the movies. She was so warm and wet and smelled like sweet water. She cried but not really. I just remember her looking around and being observant. 

The first night she was very quiet. Not a lot of crying, just observing and looking around. We were told this means she’ll have a sweet demeanor.

And just like that, I forgot about how miserable the last 16 hours were. Mommy amnesia is real. Their puffy faces and their tiny curled up bodies are a reminder that they were just inside you. That YOU created a miracle from scratch. 

Birth is magical.

JOVIE UPDATE 

Jovie is an incredible little human. Resilient to the tests that her brother puts on her day after day. She is patient, observant, and very rarely fussy unless she’s hungry, poopy, or tired. 

Something about her being a second child makes me so much calmer about her presence. I spent most of Finn’s infant life thinking he would die and I don’t feel that with Jovie. I don’t obsess over milestones because I know they’ll come, and if they don’t, we’ll deal with it then. Right now she is trying to roll, unsuccessfully. She smiles, laughs, and will chat your ear off if you’re listening and chatting back. She has an amazing amount of head control and prefers to be sitting up over lying down. She’s a people watcher and not ashamed of it. Jovie sleeps through the night pretty regularly but if she has to wake up she’s pretty no nonsense about it and will be back in her bed in under 30 minutes. She enjoys her sleep, just like her mama. 

Three months ago no one knew I was pregnant and it has been so fun sharing her with the world.